


Things Don't Work That Way

by TNKT



Series: Box Boy AU [2]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Abandonment Issues, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Boxboy AU, Child Abandonment, Conditioning, Connor & Markus (Detroit: Become Human) Friendship, Connor (Detroit: Become Human) Needs a Hug, Connor (Detroit: Become Human) Whump, Connor initiates stuff thinking he has to, Consent Issues, Developing Relationship, Dry Humping, Dubious Consent, Gen, Human Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Human Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Hurt Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mild Sexual Content, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Poor Connor, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Psychological Trauma, Recovery, Self-Esteem Issues, Soft Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Trauma, Traumatized Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Whump, aftermath of abuse, all of this happened in the past, don't worry Markus stops it before mistakes are made
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:20:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28634634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TNKT/pseuds/TNKT
Summary: Only days ago, Connor was abandoned at a gas station because his owner wasn't satisfied with him anymore. Markus was the one to find the young man injured and frightened and he decided to take him in.When Markus gets home that evening, he realizes Connor's issues run deeper than he's ever envisioned. Nothing prepared him for what the distressed box boy would be willing to do to ensure that he'd be kept by his new owner.
Relationships: Connor & Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Connor/Markus (Detroit: Become Human), can be read as gen or ship - Relationship
Series: Box Boy AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2098413
Comments: 15
Kudos: 65





	1. Connor

**Author's Note:**

> Hey pumpkin! Please be aware that the Box Boy Universe commonly contains pet whump, human trafficking, modern slavery, and all kinds of abuse.  
> This story focuses on Connor's recovery but there will be multiple allusions to his past, as well as obvious signs of trauma in his behavior. Proceed with caution! And as always, take care of yourself <3

It had been a week since the man named Markus had found him. His new owner. Connor didn't very well understand what Markus was asking of him and it made him nervous. Markus had not yet hit him even once and he didn't yell; in fact, he seemed to be careful to keep his voice down around Connor. Markus was often asking after him, things about his comfort and how he felt, always in that kind calm voice and acting like it really mattered. Connor was waiting for the other shoe to drop at any second. 

Since the older man never asked Connor to touch him or blow him, and never asked Connor to come in the bed with him, Connor couldn't make himself useful by providing his owner with physical relief and pleasure. It was very strange and new for him not to be sollicited in this manner for so long. It made Connor a little nervous, but he remembered from his courses that sometimes an owner could require longer spans of time between two instances of sex. Maybe Markus simply didn't have a very high sex drive. Or maybe, and very likely, it was Connor who was the problem.

Connor tried to compensate by being good when he made the meals and did the chores around the house. Markus worked a lot so Connor was often alone during the day. Connor tried to tamp down his anxiety each time Markus left. There was always food in the fridge and cupboards and although Connor didn't dare open either while Markus was at work since he didn't have express permission, it was reassuring to know that he wouldn't go hungry if his new owner didn't come back for several days. Markus always said _'see you tonight'_ before walking out the door, anyway, and Connor would cling onto those few words all day to reassure himself that Markus would return soon. 

Being alone meant Connor could do the chores while Markus wasn't there, and no one was there to laugh or yell at him when he kept bumping into things around the unfamiliar house. By some miracle Connor didn't break anything. When he was done with washing whatever was in the sink, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the bathroom, sweeping the whole place, doing the laundry, watering the plants, and taking out the trash, Connor would go and sit on the bed he'd been assigned to wait for his new owner to return. Sometimes there wasn't much to do at all so he'd spend all day waiting in his room.

It wasn't enough. Connor wasn't used to being this... rested, and painless, and not being told to do anything in particular. Markus had said he could watch TV but Connor had _never_ been allowed to touch the important things in a house that he could break because of his clumsiness so he definitely wasn't going to come anywhere near the screen or the remote control. Connor had gone through the bookshelves instead because Markus had said he could look at them and he'd found exactly six big books that had pictures in them, so he just flicked through the pages on a loop. When he got too bored he'd try to sleep, but often he'd startle awake and feel uneasy, like there was something big and dark prowling on the edges of his mind.

Things were calm. Connor caught sight of himself in the bathroom's mirror, in the windows, in the microwave's reflection. He could see how the man staring back at him was healing from his bruises and cuts. The rope burn around his neck was slowly fading, there were scabs on his face but no more open wounds. His eyes remained sunken and his cheekbones sharp as ever. His old owner and some of his instructors had called him beautiful as they'd brushed their thumb across the ridges. Connor had been told his facial structure was angular and fine and that he looked attractive because of it. He wondered if that was why Markus didn't tell him if he was allowed to eat lunch everyday. Eating too much would cause Connor's face to fill out gradually and he'd probably be less pretty. Despite this, Connor was allowed to eat breakfast and supper with the older man and Markus had never made him skip either of those two meals in the week he'd spent here, so it seemed that his new owner didn't want to starve him.

Sometimes Connor would cry because he felt so lost in his new home, with this new owner who still hadn't hurt him. He missed his old owner and he missed his handler. It wasn't that Connor wanted to go back to being hurt every day and eating off the floor but this all felt wrong, like he'd tasted something too sweet or eaten something too rich, an evasive kind of guilt and fear that sat heavy on his stomach. If things were so calm and good now... when would they go bad? When it stopped getting better, how deeply would Markus make it hurt? Connor hated pain, yet he wanted it to happen again soon because it was horribly stressful to have to wait and not know when Markus would strike. Anxious despair roiled deep inside of Connor every time he thought about it.

Making meals and doing chores was not enough, because Markus always said Connor didn't _need_ to do it. That meant these things weren't what Markus expected of him. That meant they weren't the things that would allow Connor to ensure that Markus would keep him. He was afraid, so very afraid that Markus would put him back in that gas station soon. It had happened so fast only just last week and Connor hadn't even understood at first, he still didn't know if he did. What he did know was that things like good food, calm, and no pain couldn't possibly come free. There had to be a price to pay somewhere.

Markus always acted like it was okay if Connor didn't finish a chore, did that mean he didn't care? Or was he counting, tallying them up until he'd finally decide to dole out a suitable punishment?

Markus didn't even want to have sex, did that mean Connor wasn't even good at that? Even though he'd had to train so hard for it and they'd told him how important it was for someone like him to be good at it. His owner had always said sex was what Connor was most useful for. Did Markus not want him?

Why was Markus keeping him, then? Did he just not see? How long until he realized that Connor was a waste of his time and money?

Of course Connor was trying his very best to be good at making food and doing chores, he was. But he knew it was not enough and he knew that one day Markus would think the same. Connor was so confused, so scared. He felt this way nearly all the time and it kept getting worse.

One day Markus asked: "Why are you so nervous, Connor?"

Connor stopped fidgeting to look up at the other man and earnestly said: "I don't know."

He couldn't put it in words, couldn't explain to his new owner what exactly was wrong, why he felt this loose and rattled inside of himself. He didn't know how to tell the man that he felt like he was slowly being crushed. How could he? Connor's feelings had never mattered so he'd never learned to talk about them. Instead, all Connor could do was drown in these emotions he couldn't figure out and cry silently on his bed when they overflowed. He was very careful never to alert Markus if the man was in the house. No one liked when Connor made a scene for no reason. Tears were only entertaining if they'd been voluntarily caused.

Connor had quickly come to the conclusion that Markus didn't ask him to do chores or meals because he expected something different. It was sex, it had to be. Connor couldn't see what he could possibly bring his new owner aside from that. Connor was slower to figure out the reason why Markus had kicked him out his bedroom and asked him to _'go get dressed and never try this kind of thing again'_. Connor had to think on what he'd done wrong the last time, when he'd waited for Markus to finish his shower while kneeling naked in front of the bed just like his owner used to ask of him. 

Maybe Markus didn't like that Connor had been so passive, just waiting to be used. Maybe Markus had found that it was a very poor attempt at seduction and that was why he'd sent Connor away. Connor knew there were more assertive manners of pleasing an owner because he'd been taught a lot of them. Flirting... Touching... Saying dirty things in an owner's ears so that they would be aroused. He just needed to try again and do better. Markus would want him this time and Markus would keep him.

It had been a long time since Connor had tried these methods with the intent to seduce, his old owner hadn't liked it when Connor initiated things. But he would try. For Markus, he would do his best. So that day Connor waited for Markus to come back home, greeted the older man and took his coat to hang it on the rack, and told him to sit down on the couch because he had a surprise for him.

"A surprise?" Markus echoed with a little smile, warm, encouraging.

Connor's hands felt cold. A bit clammy. But if this was the way Markus would like it better then Connor wanted to do it.

"Yes," said Connor. Steadily. Remembering his training, slipping into that automatic mindset, and thinking that maybe this would be easier than he'd thought.

Markus complied without asking questions. Markus was like that. He didn't question the things that Connor said he wanted to do, generally seemed to enjoy when Connor actively made choices instead of just letting things happen. Connor's certainty grew. Yes, an assertive approach would please Markus.

Connor walked after his owner and waited for Markus to sit on the couch. He felt something tremble in his chest when Markus looked up at him still smiling. Connor didn't want to disappoint him. He wanted to be the kind of box boy Markus liked and decided to keep. Connor knew what he needed to do. He focused. Feelings faded. Colors too. He focused on feeling nothing, hiding in that place deep in his head where things mattered less while his body acted out the things he'd been taught.

"I was lonely," he said.

Markus' smile diminished, concern blooming in his eyes. "Are you all right?"

Connor smiled. Prettily. Tilted his head to the side just so, as if amused and complicit. "I am now."

"Oh," said Markus. "But did you get scared before? Do you need someone to come over during the day?"

"No," Connor said in a low voice, and he leaned down to touch Markus' knee. "I'm fine with just you."

Markus' gaze darted to Connor's hand and then back to his face. "Okay. But it really wouldn't be a problem, Connor."

Connor leaned in closer and gently nudged one of Markus' legs to the side so that he could sit on his thigh. "I just want you, Markus."

Markus' hands flew up to the sides as if he didn't know where to put them. "Uh- um, okay." He looked confused. "What are you doing?"

Connor felt a spark of alarm, distantly, in that place of his mind that was far away. Doubt. Fear that maybe he was doing this the wrong way too and Markus wouldn't want him. But it was far and he smothered it. He'd already started. Connor wasn't supposed to stop when he started. The instructor got annoyed when Connor stopped.

"Getting closer," lightly answered Connor. "Getting... comfortable."

Markus stared at him with searching eyes, as if trying to figure him out. Slowly, cautiously, a hand touched Connor's back while the other just went to rest on Markus' thigh again.

"Do you want a hug?" Markus grinned a bit, teasingly. "Because I can do that, but you could just ask me instead of doing whatever this is. I could've hugged you in the entryway if that's what you wanted."

"No," smoothly answered Connor. "That's not exactly what I want."

"Then what-"

"I was alone allll day," silkily said Connor. He batted his lashes, lifted his fingers to trail them down to the space between his legs where he languidly started to rub himself over his pants. "I got bored, you know."

Markus' eyes widened. "Connor-"

Connor shifted his body to nuzzle Markus' neck and rolled his hips against the older man's leg. "You smell so good."

The hand at his back suddenly moved and Connor felt himself get jerked back by the shoulders.

"What are you doing? Stop that!"

Markus' voice was terribly loud in his ears. The older man was staring at him with wide eyes and Connor felt his own features shift to mirror the other man's shock. Markus was holding him at arm's length and his breathing was shallow, his face had paled.

"You can't do that kind of thing, Connor! I told you already! This isn't okay!"

Connor could only stare. He couldn't think. He felt paralyzed beneath that hard green stare until it finally hit him that this was a reproach. Markus was reprimanding him. Markus was unhappy with him. Connor hadn't been good.

The words finally came back to him and he said as quick as he could, "I'm sorry."

Markus wasn't letting go, his hands were too hot where they touched Connor's shoulders- but they also felt cold, or maybe it was Connor, he didn't know.

"I'm sorry," he repeated, feeling his eyes well up with tears when he realized that this was two times he'd disappointed Markus, he'd messed up, it was over. He'd proved himself useless twice in this most important matter. Markus would never want to use him now.

"I can be useful," he begged anyway, wringing his cold hands, not noticing that they were shaking. "I can be useful, I promise. I can be useful."

Markus' eyes widened even more and he let go of Connor like he'd been burned, and Connor kept wringing his hands, and he didn't know where to look. He wasn't sobbing because sobbing was noisy and he'd learned not to make noise, but the tears trickled anyway.

"Hey, no- oh, no, don't cry, Connor, Connor," quickly said Markus, and there were hands fluttering around Connor, lightly touching the back of his hand and his elbow and his shoulder but never settling. "Shit, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I got really surprised, all right? I didn't- ah, damn. Connor, it's okay, I swear I'm not mad at you."

"I-I can be useful," repeated Connor. It was like he was stuck on a loop. Everything felt strange.

"I..." A hesitation, Markus taking in a deep breath. "I know you are, Connor. But you can't do this stuff, it's... I don't want to be touched like that without warning. It's not just you, all right? I wouldn't want anyone to do that to me."

Connor didn't understand. He murmured: "But I can make you feel good."

He heard his owner inhale sharply and flinched, expecting to get hit. It didn't come.

"Connor, things don't work that way," eventually stated Markus. He sounded kind of worn, somehow. "You can't do this again. Any of this. We're not going to have sex." 

Connor felt something inside of him drop to the bottom of his stomach. There was a long silence. He waited. 

Markus said: "Look, I need to make a call. You can go do whatever you want."

"I'm sorry," whispered Connor. He felt terribly ashamed and sick of himself for not getting anything right. 

"It's all right." Markus slowly shifted so that Connor would get off his lap and then stood up in front of him. "Just don't do that again, okay?"

Connor nodded meekly. He knew he didn't deserve to be kept in such a nice house with such a nice owner, but the words slipped past his lips before he could think to stop them.

"Please don't get rid of me..."

Markus froze mid-step and Connor cringed, certain that his owner was going to whirl around and slap him for speaking out of turn. But Markus' movements were slow when he turned to face Connor, and his voice wasn't loud when he said: "I'm not, Connor. This doesn't change anything."

Connor kept his gaze carefully glued to the ground.

Markus came back and gently touched Connor's shoulder, which was when Connor realized he was shaking. Markus quietly said: "Go get a glass of water. And then I think you should lie down for a bit. All right?"

"All right," automatically answered Connor.

"I'm not mad at you," said Markus. "I'm really not. I'm sorry I scared you like that."

"Sorry," said Connor. It kind of felt like his brain had broken.

A pause. "Yeah. It's okay, Connor." Markus' hand patted his shoulder. "Go. We'll talk more about this later if you want."

Connor nodded again and started to make his way to the kitchen, arms wrapped around his stomach, his steps careful just in case he broke more of himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- 08/01/2021 -
> 
> Hey pumpkin! As it was once mentioned, here is a more detailed look into what happened the first time Connor actively attempted to seduce Markus into doing the spicy stuff. Yes it's painful for all parties involved, readers included :)))
> 
> Here's the conversation on the whump server that followed the end scene:
> 
> _N : Anyway i cant believe you end right where both boys are shook and unhappy_
> 
>  _Me: Ahaha_  
>  _Me: Their early days were very difficult_  
>  _Me: How would you have wished it to end?_
> 
> _A: WITH HUGS AND REASSURANCES AND PATS AND GOOD FOOD HE FEELS HE DOESN'T NEED TO EARN_
> 
> Well, A might be onto something there. We'll see.
> 
> Thanks for reading, spare some thoughts for your author in the comments!


	2. Markus

Markus needed space. He hurried out of the living room in a few long strides and yanked the door open to step out in the yard. He was careful not to slam the door behind him. There, outside in the cool yard, he took a deep breath to steady himself. He'd felt his heart drop when Connor had started touching himself right in Markus' lap as if it was normal. He could still feel Connor's body warmth where the young man had humped his leg- only for a second or two, but too long nonetheless. Connor had been flirting with him from the moment he'd asked Markus to go sit down on the couch for a surprise. Markus hadn't caught on at all. He'd thought Connor was going to show him a drawing he'd made or maybe food he'd prepared, something harmless that he was proud of, not- not _that_.

Markus tipped his head back and stared up at the clouds, wondering what the hell he'd gotten into. He'd known that Connor was not a normal guy in his twenties but he hadn't realized that this kind of shit would happen. It was the way Connor had touched his knee with that coaxing smile on his face that had shifted the atmosphere around them. Markus hadn't realized right away what that smile meant because he'd never seen it in Connor before. A foreboding sensation had started tickling the back of his head when Connor's actions had grown even more daring and invasive, sitting on Markus' lap without his permission like it was natural- as if he belonged there. Something had been off about the young man and Markus had tried to divert whatever disastrous trajectory he could feel they were heading down, and it hadn't worked.

A _hug_.

"Idiot," Markus muttered to himself.

He'd thought, or hoped, that Connor would get the message and stop what he was doing. That this would be the way to let him down gently. Markus hadn't realized that Connor had been completely intent on following through with his decision to make sexual advances towards him, even though he should've guessed, with the way Connor was acting unnaturally sure of himself. It was obvious now that Markus should have put a firm stop to things from the moment Connor had sat on his thigh and said _'I just want you, Markus.'_ But Markus had been too overwhelmed and confused by Connor's abnormal behavior to think clearly, and hindsight was twenty/twenty.

The shock of realizing that Connor was really, actually initiating a sexual act in such a blunt manner had frozen Markus' brain. The foreboding had exploded into violent consternation the moment Connor's hand had dipped between his own legs while he was sitting on Markus. It had been disturbing to see the mild-mannered and nervous individual Markus had come to know over the last week suddenly act so debauched, and then Connor had turned to hump his leg. Markus had been struck by the sheer wrongness of the situation like a bolt from the blue and he hadn't been able to think about anything other than the fact that he wanted this to _stop._ He'd needed Connor to stop using his thigh to get himself off, he'd needed to establish a distance, he'd needed to breathe.

Markus had been so disturbed that when he'd jerked Connor away and ordered him to stop, he'd felt like he'd just run a marathon. Markus had felt suddenly scared of what Connor was able to do, of the ways Connor would try to take advantage of him without even a word of warning. Markus couldn't say that he'd ever been violated by anyone; but it had disturbed him the two or three times someone who'd had one too many drinks had tried to feel him up without his consent at a party or a bar. If that person had been a friend or a collegue, such an action changed Markus' perception of them into something worrying and unpredictable because he couldn't ignore what had happened. He couldn't _not_ be wary of them even after they'd gone back to normal.

It was the same with Connor. Markus hadn't been able to predict that Connor would do something like that to him. None of what had just happened was okay and Markus was hit with the thought that maybe he'd read the younger man all wrong, that maybe he wasn't as harmless and innocent as he seemed; that Markus had definitely made a mistake taking in a stranger just because he'd found the guy hurt and scared in that god forsaken gas station. But the other part of him couldn't believe that Connor was really that harmful, that it was a conscious choice for him to be so inconsiderate of Markus' boundaries. Markus couldn't pretend that Connor's obvious distress over getting rejected a second time was all an act. 

Markus hadn't expected Connor to cry like that, for the desperate apologies to tumble out of the man's mouth or for the tears to come rushing forward in an immediate waterfall. It had felt like a spell had been broken and Connor had suddenly snapped back into the person Markus had seen before, the one he knew better, scared and nervous instead of steady and alluring. Markus hadn't known what to think of the switch but he had understood that Connor was terrified in the way he was pale and shaking and wringing his hands, and that it was at least partly because of the way Markus had reacted. Markus hadn't meant to bodily shove Connor away or to raise his voice, it had been entirely reflexes; but then he'd remembered what his friends had said about the way he had to be careful when he handled Connor and his obvious signs of extensive abuse.

So Markus had apologized too, mad at himself for forgetting, but also beyond disturbed that Connor had even done this in the first place. He didn't think he was angry at Connor- maybe not yet. Markus knew there was more to this than met the eye and he knew that Connor had attenuating circumstances, and being angry at a person who was already crying and shaking like a leaf in front of him would lead him nowhere. But Markus was not willing to pretend that this situation was entirely his fault when Connor had been the one to force himself onto him to begin with. 

Markus felt unsteady, cracked by this violation of trust and intimacy. Connor's tears and plea not to be abandoned had been genuine and Markus was not going to go back on his word that this didn't change anything to their arrangement; but he felt like a fault line had appeared in the ground beneath his feet and he needed guidance. 

Markus took another deep breath and made the call he'd been meaning to on his way out of the house. It was late, the breeze that slithered up his clothes was cold as he brought his phone to his ear. He shivered, and thought about the way Connor had started shaking from the moment Markus had raised his voice to get him to stop. How Connor had still been shaking when he'd left to get a glass of water from the kitchen. Markus knew he'd scared Connor and that the other man wasn't all right, maybe hadn't been all right for days and had reached a breaking point only now. He'd noticed how Connor had been getting more and more skittish lately. Obviously something had triggered tonight's indecent behavior. And Markus was pretty sure that Connor somehow thought that his actions would have convinced Markus to keep him if Markus had accepted to go along with them.

But he hadn't gone along with them. 

_"I can be useful, I promise. I can be useful."_

Connor was obviously terrified that he'd get abandoned again.

Josh finally picked up the other end of the line. "Hello?"

"Hey, Josh. I've got a problem."

"Is it Connor?"

Markus mirthlessly smiled. He'd called his friends a few times over the week for this reason so it didn't surprise him that this was Josh's first guess. "Yeah." His smile fell away just as fast and his voice turned entirely grim. "Listen... I think he just tried to make me have sex with him."

"What? Are you all right?"

"I'm... okay, yeah. I think I'm fine. Just a bit shaken. He wasn't aggressive or anything but I didn't see it coming."

"How did this happen?"

"He sat on my lap while I was on the couch and started touching himself. And then he rubbed himself on my leg. He never... He never asked. He just... did it." Markus rubbed his face, couldn't help that he sounded just as disturbed as he felt. "He flirted with me. Like he knew what he was doing. And then when I told him to stop- I forced him to stop, and he cried. I know I shouldn't have snapped like that or manhandled him, Josh, I do know that, but I didn't think, and then he was crying and shaking and I think I really scared him."

"Slow down," Josh calmly told him. "No one's hurt, right? You're fine."

"You guys _told me_ ," insisted Markus. "You told me and I still went and scared him."

"You didn't expect him to do that, Markus, I think it's normal that you tried to stop him any way you could without thinking of the repercussions."

But Markus wasn't listening, not completely. "Josh, how was I supposed to react to that? What if he does it again? I can't- I don't know what he wants from me. I mean I know he thinks that he has to do all these chores and prepare the food and- and have sex with me, obviously that's what he's used to doing. I keep telling him he doesn't need to do all those things and I already told him not to pull something like that time when he was just naked in my room waiting for me to jump him or whatever and _still_ -" Markus stopped, caught his breath. "Did he not understand? Was I not clear enough? I don't know what I'm supposed to do to make him understand. I don't have a damn clue. He really thought I'd just roll with it tonight, I mean, he broke down when I told him no. Maybe it's because I was too brutal but honestly, I also think it's because he didn't expect me to, so how the hell am I supposed to make him feel safe if he thinks I just want to fuck him? Josh, he asked me not to get rid of him right after I refused. It's like he thinks sex is the only thing I'd allow him to stay for."

"It would make sense."

Markus frowned. "What do you mean?"

"He's a box boy so he's been taught he's supposed to do three things for his owner. You told him he didn't need to do the food or household chores, so that leaves the sex."

"But I told him to get out of my room last time, I thought..."

"Did you explicitely tell him you two wouldn't be having sex?"

"...No. I guess not. I thought I'd been clear but maybe I wasn't."

"What did you say?"

"I told him to get out of my room and not do that kind of thing again. That I wasn't the kind of guy to have sex with the first person I met, and definitely not in exchange for letting someone stay over at my house." Markus rubbed his forehead. "But Josh, he still does the chores and the food even if I told him he didn't need to, so why would he suddenly think sex is the only solution?"

"I don't think it's sudden for him, Markus. He's probably always thought that way. The fact that you told him he wasn't needed for the food or the chores might've lead to a misinterpretation on his part where he thinks that means you don't need _him_ , since that's two out of the three ways he knows how to make himself useful to an owner that you've made clear you could cover yourself. That leaves sex, and since you hadn't completely shut that down, that's what he went for. It's... a logical deduction, for him. He probably didn't see why else you'd be keeping him."

Markus' eyes had widened. It was like someone had punched him in the chest with a hard fist of guilt and panic. "Oh, god, I didn't- I didn't realize that was how he could interpret it!"

"You can fix it," quickly said Josh. "You're not trained for dealing with this kind of conditioning, Markus, it's normal to make mistakes. You're not a therapist."

"How do I fix _this_ , though? I don't want him to believe that I think he's useless. It's not like I can just take back what I said about him not needing to do chores... can I?"

"You can try. You can keep thanking him like you already do. For now he's not nearly stable enough for us to try and make him understand that an individual shouldn't need to exchange services against the fulfillment of their basic needs."

"And the sex?" It was what bothered Markus the most, he couldn't deny it. "You're telling me he thinks that he needs to barter his body for a roof over his head, how do I convince him of otherwise? I don't want him to think I'd take advantage of him like that. Hell, he doesn't even see it as taking advantage, he probably thinks it's normal that I'd want that from him."

"Yes," agreed Josh, and it didn't make Markus feel very good. "He's going to have to learn how to live normally. It's going to take time. Do you remember what North said about hypersexuality?"

"Common in sexual abuse survivors," said Markus. "I know. I thought of that."

"Especially since he's been conditioned to think he needs to give this to his owner. It's likely this is going to be a recurrent event you'll have to be ready for."

Markus had so many questions. How was he supposed to be ready for that? What telltale signs would he have to watch out for? What was the best way to handle Connor when he behaved like that? What was Markus supposed to tell him? What were the wrong moves he needed to avoid? They were too many and Markus didn't know where to start. He didn't know what to say. Eventually he said: "Josh, I don't know if I can do this."

"What do you want to do, then?"

"Isn't there anyone who'd be qualified to look after a box boy?"

"I think you'd have to do a lot of ownership paperwork since you're the one who found him, and then some more for transfer of that ownership." A pause. "Or do what his owner did."

"No," sharply said Markus. "Don't mess with me, you know I'd never do that."

"So you'd be willing to look into that paperwork?"

Markus was silent for a long time. When he spoke again, it wasn't in answer to that question. He was still reeling from what had happened earlier and felt lost.

"I think he thought coming onto me like that would make me want to keep him. He definitely thought that, from what you're saying, right? I guess I knew that even before I called you, but it's so... I don't know what I should do. I've got no damn clue. Fuck, Josh, I don't know what the hell I've gotten myself into." Markus was surprised to hear his own voice break and suddenly he needed to sit, so he dropped to the cold grass. He felt the humidity from the day's rain seep into the seat of his pants and didn't care. Quietly, he said: "I never wanted a box boy."

"I know."

"This is so messed up."

"It is," softly said Josh. "And it's a lot of responsability. No one would blame you if you estimated you couldn't do this, after Carl."

Markus stared down at the wet blades of grass. It had taken up a huge part of his life to look after his disabled father alone. Carl's death had been horrible to live through and it had taken a long time for Markus to grieve, but he'd also thought that he was done sacrificing his life for another person's. He'd even given up on helping his brother who never seemed to want to recover from his drug addiction. And now he had a perfect stranger on his hands who'd been through abuse so horrific that the few details Markus did possess made him sick to the stomach. He didn't know if he had what it took to help someone as damaged as Connor. But...

"He's terrified that I'll get rid of him, Josh. He asked me not to." Markus remembered how small Connor's voice had been, how desperate. He shook his head. "Begged me, even."

"And you don't want to do that to him."

"I'm not a monster," snapped Markus, heat surging forth in a wave of indignation, but then it fell back just as fast and he closed his eyes. "Sorry. I don't want to yell at you."

"Don't worry. You're overwhelmed, justifiably so," calmly said Josh. "I can come over if you want."

"Yeah, I'd like that. I really need help with this whole thing. It's messing with my head."

"All right, I'll be there as soon as possible. Where is Connor now?"

"He was getting a glass of water before I came out here to call you. I told him to go lie down afterwards."

"You should check on him."

"I intend to."

"We really need to find him a therapist."

"Yeah. Think you could figure that out for us?"

"I will definitely try. I'll see you later, Markus. Maybe you should check if he's hungry as well."

"Yeah, you're right. I'll do that. See you."

Markus hung up and let his arm rest in his lap. He stayed there for a while because he still felt unsettled and wasn't ready to check on Connor just yet. Eventually his butt got too cold so he stood up and went back inside anyway. He hesitated to seek out the other man so soon but felt uneasy not to try, and it quickly turned out that Connor wasn't anywhere downstairs, which meant that he'd probably followed Markus' advice and gone to lie down. Markus walked to the stairs and paused at the bottom. If Connor was scared, was it really a good idea to go find him now? Josh had said he should go check on him. Second-guessing himself like this was of no use. Markus steeled himself and climbed the staircase, almost wishing for Connor to already be asleep so that he wouldn't have to deal with him so soon after the disturbing events that had unfolded in the living room.

Connor was not in his room. Markus frowned and went to check the rest of the upstairs. He didn't see a single trace of the young man's presence. He briefly entertained the distressing notion that Connor had been scared off and had somehow ran away without Markus noticing his departure, but he quickly discarded it. That really didn't seem like it would be Connor's style.

"Connor? Where are you?" he called out, and then he stayed very still, listening to the empty corridor.

"In my room," came the faint answer.

Markus returned there and pushed the door open again. "Connor? Are you hiding?"

"...Yes." Connor's voice was small. It seemed to come from under the bed. 

Markus didn't step inside any further. He felt that it would probably be safer for the both of them if he stayed where he was in the doorway. He pointed out: "You know, people who hide usually don't let it be known where they're hiding. Thank you for letting me know that you were here, though. Why are you hiding?"

"I... Please, don't make me leave."

"I'm not making you leave. You can hide if you want, Connor, and I'm not making you leave," Markus assured him.

Connor fell silent. Markus strained his ears for any sobs or sniffling, but there was no noise. Then again Connor had not been making any noise when he'd started crying in Markus' lap. Markus suddenly wondered if the young man had cried other times this week that he hadn't been made aware of. He now suspected that Connor may have been the type to hide it.

"I'm sorry for hiding," said Connor's muffled voice. "Are you mad?"

"No. You can hide if you want," repeated Markus. "Did your owner get mad if you hid?"

"Sometimes... But I stopped."

"You stopped hiding?"

Connor's voice grew even more subdued. "I stopped hiding when I wasn't asked to."

Whatever that meant, Markus was not comfortable opening that can of worms right now. "...Well, it's not making me mad, that's for sure. Do you want to stay there? Or we could eat something together. I called Josh, just now. He said it would be nice if you ate. You went through a bit of a shock earlier."

"...I upset you."

Markus paused. He was tempted to lie, to reassure, and he knew that Josh had said it was still too early to make Connor understand this kind of thing. But Markus didn't feel good about pretending. Honesty was important to him.

"...Yes, Connor. You did, but it isn't for the same reasons as you think. You're not useless, okay? I want you to stay here and it's very helpful when you do chores around the house. I just don't want you to do anything sexual." Markus tried to find the right words to explain what he wanted to convey; to find words that make understandable this situation which, horribly enough, Connor seemed to have never encountered before. "I was upset because I didn't expect that you'd engage in any kind of sexual behavior towards me after I told I didn't want it the last time. It's... It's something called consent. I can explain it later to you if you'd like to understand. But right now I think it would be nice if you and I went downstairs to get a bite in the kitchen."

There was a moment of silence during which Markus could almost feel Connor's nervous hesitation like a third physical presence in the room. Then he heard shifting, and Connor came out from under the bed with movements that were slow and cautious. He still looked fragile from earlier; not as pale, and his eyes were only a bit red from crying, but when he finally stood in front of Markus he kept his arms wrapped around himself and his brown eyes were wide as ever even as they remained downcast. That was another thing Markus had noticed about Connor: direct eye contact was very rare, and on certain days it was even nonexistent.The weird thing was that when Connor did look at his face, he didn't seem to really _see_ his expressions.

"Hey, you're all right," softly said Markus. He stepped aside out in the hallway. "I promise you're not in trouble. Come on. Let's go eat."

Connor nodded and walked after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- 15/01/2021 -  
> Hey pumpkin!  
> Yeah, this is the end of this story. Not as expansive as it could have been, but I wasn't feeling up to prolongating and the chapter's been lying around like this for a while so might as well post it as is.  
> It was very interesting writing Markus' side of this event, so I hope you found it interesting too.  
> Thanks for reading, please share your thoughts in the comments!


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